American Surprises

An incomplete list of surprising things upon our return and since:

People use the phrase “I like to service my clients” and “How can I service you better?” with straight faces.

Texting my sister is easy because I don’t have to do any math to know if she is awake.

Hardly anyone notices Bean has an accent.

Frugal staples which used to pad out our diet (chick peas, lentils, beans, tofu, bell peppers) are more expensive than meat.

Every single store I shop in wants my phone number and email.

Parking lot etiquette is reversed.

So Al Franken is a Senator now?

I don’t recognize anyone on the cover of US Weekly.

Barbecue sauces are more abundant than salad dressings in our grocery store.

Everyone knows what to do if a street light goes out (treat it like a four-way stop).

Sports are a Social Thing (and I like it).

My credit card gives me cash back. Just because.

Garage Sales. See also: Barn Sales. Delicious.

and TV commercials are different. I can’t explain it. The lighting maybe?

… to be continued.


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