Independence Day: or how to roast a chicken

It’s almost the 4th of July. One of my favourite holidays, and yet another opportunity to subject my ex-pat acquaintance to a good dousing of Americana.

This year, I heartily recommend blending two of America’s best culinary clichés (preferably while humming patriotic anthems): barbecuing large quantities of meat, and using an eclectic spice fusion reminiscent of the great Melting Pot tradition.

Oh, and add beer. Essential.

The method?

It’s Unconventional. It’s Sloppy. Stick with me.

First, create a sweet and spicy rub for a beautiful chicken. With paprika and probably brown sugar. Maybe one like this.

Then, get to know your chicken. I feel more comfortable giving it a name, given the things I’m about to do. Ours is named Fernandez.

Pat your new Poultry-Buddy dry all over, inside and out, and then rub it down with the spice mix.

Every inch, every crevice. Get that tasty sauce covering every possible piece of skin.

Slather it like white on rice (even if it takes you to weird places. Like massaging a chicken’s spine. from the inside.)

Then the most important bit: open a can of beer.

Any kind you like will do, though I always stick with something trashy and truly American. It seems to suit the method.

Drink almost half (the post-sex cigarette of the kitchen? Don’t answer that.)

Now sit the chicken on the can. Snug it down firmly so it will stay upright while in the oven.

As it cooks, the hot beer will steam the chicken from the inside, keeping it moist and succulent and infusing it with a malty goodness.

Gross? Weird? Probably.

Also, hands down the best roast chicken I’ve ever made.

A more complete version of Jamie Oliver’s recipe and a proper explanation can be found at Certain Cravings.

Trust me. Get over your inhibitions and seize your right to the pursuit of happiness with this chicken. You’ll thank me for it.

And hey, if you want to go crazy, you can make one of these crazy wacked out flag-theme-o-rama treats too (this is exactly why I love Pinterest).


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